Mood AF: My Current Life Update

Lately, I have been on such a journey towards mindfulness and self-help. I have been watching documentaries such as, The Secret, in efforts to learn ways to let go of stress and manifest happiness, wealth, health and love into my life. I want to constantly be in high energy in efforts to completely change my life.

Let me give you a little background as to why. I have been stagnant lately. I have been stuck in my current role for 12 years now. I am paid well however, I do not find fulfillment in what I do. I have applied to countless jobs, reached out to countless recruiters, sent my resumes to staffing agencies, you name it, I have done it.

I recently became really close to being hired. I went all the way through the interviewing process, from the recruiter, to the hiring manager, to meeting the directors and executives of the department. I thought I had nailed it and that my days at my current employer were ending. I visualized myself handing in that recognition letter, and the joy that it brought me to finally move on to a company that I can see myself excel and actual love showing up to work every day. I could not wait! It was the happiest I had been in a long time. To know that my days at this stagnant job were ending and my life was about to take a turn for the better.

I waited and waited for the call welcoming me on board and getting all my ducks in a row to start my journey to this new role. Nevertheless, the call never came and I found myself going back to those negative vibrations of feeling stagnant and doubtful. For the next few days, I was down and had no energy to get up in the morning and go to work. I thought about quitting my blog; however, something inside of me just would let me quit. I did not want to continue to feel those emotions and instead wanted happiness. I told myself, “this cannot be the end of my life” and I vowed to do all I can to live in a constant state of happiness regardless of what life throws at me.

All my life, I have always been worrisome – to the point that I actually fear developing a terminal illness. I watched a Netflix documentary called “Healed”, where it talks about how stresses can really be the cause of all these health complications and autoimmune diseases. Thanks to this documentary, I am certain it is time to learn to shift my mindset, to refocus my thoughts on positivity and to live in bliss; no matter what. I want to live to meet great grandchildren and to be able to enjoy all the stages of life, to live a full life. So I knew it was time to take control of my body.

Since then, I have started to drink green tea’s which I have read are great for improving your health. I have considered going back to therapy and I am learning to alter my negative thoughts with more positive, happy ones. I decided to talk about what is bothering me as opposed to keeping it bottled up inside and to see the good in everything. I have also been extremely committed to journaling, every single day; to write down what I am currently grateful for and what I appreciate about the people around me.

I am no where close to where I want to be, however, I have already noticed such a change in my days. I no longer feel bitterness, resentment, jealous or envy towards the things I see on social media or worry about people and things that really serve me no purpose. I am in acceptance and have much more peace than before. My days are already looking brighter and it I declare, in the name of Jesus, that things will only get better for me from here on out and I will get that new dream job I have been waiting for.